Your father has always been a proud and independent man, but ever since Mom died, something’s changed. His appearance is disheveled, the house is a mess, and there’s never enough healthy food in the fridge. It’s reached the point that you’re worried about his health and wellbeing. You’d like to help Dad out more but have a full-time job and household to manage. What should you do? Getting aging loved ones to accept in-home care is never easy. Here’s how to get even the most stubborn senior to say “Yes.”

Why Do Seniors Refuse Home Care?

Since the average senior has spent a lifetime running a household and working at various jobs, they don’t like to be lectured by others about managing their affairs—notably their adult children.

Whether it’s from an informal caregiver or a professional, seniors often refuse home care for reasons like:

  • Denial
  • Privacy concerns
  • Embarrassment
  • Pride
  • Apathy

Confusion and memory loss caused by dementia or Alzheimer’s can further cloud a senior’s judgment. Once cognitive changes occur, convincing a loved one to accept care can be even more challenging.

Getting an Elderly Loved One to Agree

Every senior deserves the right to age in place with dignity and respect. Once you start noticing that your elderly loved one is having trouble performing activities of daily living (ADLs), here’s how to gently ease them into the idea of in-home care:

Voice your concerns

Look for “red flags” around your senior’s home like dirty dishes in the sink, stacks of unpaid bills, or piles of dirty laundry. Choose a non-threatening setting to sit down with them and respectfully share your concerns. Politely ask if they are having trouble completing household tasks like laundry, cooking, or cleaning. If so, offer to help.

Involve other family members

If your initial conversation doesn’t go well, ask your siblings or other loved ones to chime in. Approach the seniors as a unified group and tell them how much they mean to you, along with why you are all worried about their health and wellbeing. Hearing the same message from multiple parties may be all it takes to change a stubborn loved one’s mind.

Enlist trusted outsiders

If you are still having trouble convincing them, the next step is to involve some trusted outsiders like a doctor, faith leader, or close friend. A geriatric care manager can also do a complete health assessment and make recommendations to the group while your loved one is present.

Share “real life” examples

Share examples of elderly friends or neighbors who benefited from having a “personal assistant” around the home. Point out family members who have used in-home care over the years and how it allowed them to continue living independently rather than going into a long-term care facility.

Discuss the benefits

If Dad is lonely, mention how your presence could help cheer him up. If he’s having trouble getting around, discuss specific ways that you could lend assistance. Once you have a dialogue going, it’s easier to be blunt and honest with your loved one. While you have his attention, mention again the advantages of remaining at home versus moving into an assisted living retirement community.

Stay the course

A good strategy is to slowly ease your loved one into the idea of receiving care for only a few hours per week. For example, volunteer to take Dad to his medical appointments or clean his house. After he’s gotten used to the idea of having someone around—and reaped the benefits— you can usually convince even the most stubborn senior to accept help from their newfound “personal assistant!”

Flexible Home Care Solutions for Seniors in Bradenton, FL

Caring for an aging loved one can be challenging when you’re busy or live far away. At First In Care, our compassionate caregivers can step in and provide your seniors with the attention and support they deserve. While serving as an extended family in your loved one’s home, our highly trained professionals understand the requirement to maintain a client’s quality of life, along with their dignity and self-esteem.

In addition to companionship care uniquely tailored to your family’s needs, First In Care also provides in-home support for other daily living activities like personal hygiene, light housework, medication reminders, and transportation. Our senior caregiving services are affordable, flexible, and always delivered in a seamless package that restores your peace of mind. To learn more now about our private home health and concierge services in Bradenton and Manatee County, Florida, please visit